And the Heisman goes to...

...Salma Hayek.  She deserves a trophy for her "body" of work, yes no?  Seriously, this picture pretty much forces each heterosexual guy back into infant mode with one glance.  And if it doesn't do that for you, go look at pictures of Ryan Seacrest or something, ya big geh.

So who's it really gonna be, folks?  It happens Saturday.  Yes, this Saturday.  The regular season has come to an end, it's now bowl time, and the Heisman trophy, so coveted, so smooth, so fresh, so clean...is ready to be put on somebody's mantle.  Or under lock and key in a glass case, depending on their ego.

I could break down each player by position, stats, popularity, and realistic chances of winning, but that would be pointless considering I found a site that has nailed the last 5 winners.  And I read what they had to say.  And I can't say I'm surprised.

Before I post the link, however, I would like to say that just like the BCS system, I think the unwritten rules of this trophy should be re-hashed, re-done, re-thought.  For example:

You can't lose too many games to be considered.

Poppycock and bullpoo.  If you are the "most outstanding college football player", what does it matter if your team loses four or five games?  Or all eleven or twelve, for that matter?  If you're the best, and your team blows ass, that counts against you?  Bush league.

Upperclassmen have the advantage.

Um...why?  That's some BS fraternity rule right there.  I remember I pledged a certain fraternity at the University of Alabama mainly because of one thing---freshman could play on a-team intramural squads.  Yes, I based an entire semester of hell on the fact that I could play football with the upperclassmen.  Never said my priorities were in line.  Anyway, back to the topic, if a freshman (say...Michael Crabtree) outperformed juniors and seniors, he gets the shaft?  All of a sudden he's not outstanding?  To quote Jeff from Grandma's Boy, "Your shit's WEAK, yo.  Shiiit's weeak."

Offensive players dominate the percentage of the votes.

Okay, this is where I really take exception.  Even though MY BOY beat the system (Charles Woodson), there hasn't been anyone else after him close to winning the Heisman who plays primarily defensive ball.  Had Glenn Dorsey not been injured in seemingly every game this year, maybe he could have bucked the trend, but we need to put more emphasis on defense.  Sure offense is more exciting, and those players have the ball in their hands more than defenders, but everyone on that field is a football player and can be termed "the most outstanding player" at the college level.

All that being said, it's probably a waste of my time and energy.  I'm sure some good ole boys who smoke cigars and clink their whiskey glasses together every Saturday hold the Heisman trophy status and rules in their pockets, so arguing with "tradition" is simply a waste of time (right Auburn fans?  nudge nudge, wink wink).

Now go on over to Stiff Arm Trophy and peruse what they have to say.  I daresay they have the top two correct, and it should very well come down to them.  I'm also hearing that their top three candidates are the only ones being invited to New York, though don't quote me on that.

The mock draft will continue later today.  'Til then, my friends.

Comments

[joe]

Colt Brennan - 131 touchdown passes, 23 NCAA records, only undefeated team in America. Who else can say that? How can Colt Brennan not win the Heisman? If you are skeptical, I challenge you to watch last week's Hawaii Vs Washington. Colt is incredible. You might become a believer.

[Joker]

I did see that Brennan is also being invited to New York, so he's in the mix as well. I'm not doubting the NCAA all-time touchdown leader---but the voters will notice how his schedule was utter crap. You can't argue with that, and you also can't argue that June Jones has a system in place that enables QBs to put up gawdy stats. It's like me on Tecmo Super Bowl; try your best, but on my worst day I'm scoring 63.

That's not to say Colt can't go on to have some kind of production at the next level. That's not for me to say. But think about this---Colt was always passing it. And I mean ALWAYS. And he had 4 talented receivers.

What if Florida never handed off to the the running back or ran silly reverses and such? Adding those up, would Tebow have 37 rushing TDs instead of his SEC record 22?

What if McFadden took all of Felix Jones's carries? Adding those up, would Run DMC have 2800 yards and 26 TDs on the ground to go with his 4 TDs passing and 1 TD receiving?

Better yet, what if those two SEC players played that WhACk ass schedule Hawaii played? And struggled like Hawaii did, keeping Tebow and McFadden playing until the end of the game?

Those are the intangibles you have to think about when voting. Again, not taking away from Colt, but the heroics we saw from the SEC guys was unreal this year in the best conference in America.