Week Ocho Pickso

Mila Kunis.  Underrated as hell.  It's not all about big boobs, kids.  That woman is hot.  Sure she's been with that Culkin kid from Home Alone for years and years, but let's not hold that against her.  She looks hot in the new Max Payne trailers, and we all know that's what counts.  Plus she reminds me of the Russian stripper that I...heard...about?

Okay, so right now Walter is a big bag of douche.  He kicked my butt last week, 4-1 to 2-3, and since I'm being a gentleman, I'll consider my 2-3 to be 1-3-1.  I suppose it's fair to call a push a tie, but damn...I thought I'd have some pull with my OWN site.  Guess not.  Is this what it's like to be married?  Anyway, that makes him the current leader, and I'm not happy about that.  He's a good dude though, he knows what he's talking about, and we're both in the black, so I can't complain.

Kates through Week 7:

5 Beckinsales - 5-3-1
4 Beckinsales - 10-7
3 Beckinsales - 7-6
 2 Beckinsales - 8-10
1 Beckinsales - 5-7

Joker/Walter Challenge as of Week 7:

Walter - 15-10
Joker - 14-10-1

WEEK EIGHT PICKS - LEZ DO IT TO IT:

***1 Beckinsale***  BOSTON COLLEGE -2.5 Va Tech - Tech simply can't move the ball anymore.  27 points on Western Kentucky?  Say huuuh?  They've lost the Beamer ball identity, there are no leaders, and it's just not "right" over there.  Look for the Eagles to play solid, straight up ball and walk out with a good win.
WIN - It's kinda sad watching the Hokies fall from grace.  Hard not to like Beamer.

***1 Beckinsale***  Southern Miss +3 RICE - This is just my version of a "nut up" game for the Golden Eagles.  They're a pretty good team to bet with, as they play good defensive ball and can influence spreads quietly.  Yes Rice has the deadly Clement to Dillard combo going on, but I have faith SoMiss can pull out a win here.
LOSS - 45-40 is damn close.  Good effort Eagles.

***2 Beckinsales***  Brigham Young -1 TCU -I hear a lot of people taking the Horned Frogs on this one, hoping the Cougars' run will stop here.  BYU has shown some legit defense this year, something I'm not used to seeing from them.  I say they keep the win streak alive this Saturday.  It'll be a dogfight, no doubt, and this line may as well be even, but I'm just going with the lucky team.
LOSS -  I wavered on this all week, and stubbornly stuck to the whiteys.  I think I was the only one in America to bet on BYU, cuz my mom says it's okay to be different.  So basically I blame my mother on this one.  (Clarification---only one to bet on BYU from threads/articles I read and guys I "talk shop" with.  I'm aware most people bet on BYU)

***2 Beckinsales***  BAMA -13 Ole Miss - This is one of those "oh God, stay away from this line" or even better "lock of the year" from certain people, taking the Rebels.  They'll claim the win in the Swamp, Houston Nutt's perennial hard-playing teams against the Crimson Tide, and yada yada.  They keep forgetting we're a different Alabama team now.  I'm using that, and the fact that Nick Saban has had two weeks to prepare, AND the belief that JPW will finally "click" and start hitting his receivers for more than 7 yard outs.  I say we make a statement, at home for once, and the "Bama should be #1" talk will resume.  Even though I hope we stay at #2 all damn year long.
LOSS - Wanna know why I didn't 5 Beckinsale my own team this week?  Ask our FUCKING LOUSY second half performances over the year.  Guess what's wrong with recruiting nice mama's boys who buy into the system, Nick??  NO KILLER INSTINCT.  NONE.  New 4th Quarter Motto:  "Play not to lose!"  It's only a game, fellas!  We get pizza and capri-sun after the game win or lose!!

***2 Beckinsales***  Pittsburgh -3 NAVY - This one was simple to me.  I just think the Panthers show up and dominate.  Navy, while a skeetch better than they normally are, can't hang with them if Pitt actually shows up and starts balling.  Besides, the Panthers have revenge on their minds from last year's defeat at the hands of the Midshipmen in their own house, and they had an off week to prepare.
WIN - Too much red on this page.

***3 Beckinsales***  UConn - 1 RUTGERS - UConn is one of those opportunistic teams that seem to capitalize on opponents' mistakes and hit the ground running once they find a rhythm.  I see them establishing a good gameplan in Piscataway while Mike Teel and his overrated teammates look with blank faces for guidance from coach Greg Schiano, where he will follow with a similar face, adding a shoulder shrug.
LOSS - Last minute missed field goal equals more mental anguish for Mr. Joker.  WHY THE HELL CAN'T KIDS KICK ANYMORE????  (Just saw the replay---off the upright you pansy ass???)

***3 Beckinsales*** GEORGIA -13.5 (bought point) Vandy - This one is pretty simple for me.  There are a lot of teams in the SEC that shouldn't have the hype they do.  Vanderbilt, although a nice story, is one of them.  The one risky part here is that Mackenzi Adams is getting the start over Chris Nickson, and he's the wildcard in all this.  But he has never in his life seen a defense like the Bulldogs, and the Commodore defense has no idea what the 1-2 punch of a rolling Stafford and Moreno snowball will do to them.  I bought a point juuuust in case, though.
LOSS -  I guess I should pay more attention to the wildcard.  Fuck you Georgia.

***3 Beckinsales***  Southern Cal -43 WASH STATE - Yes, you read that correctly, I am taking the favorite on a 43 point spread.  The Cougars are damn near the worst team in all of D1 football, and they are taking on the most talented team in the nation.  Yes, I know, Stanford was a 41-point underdog last year and look what happened.  Well, Georgia beat us last year, and look what happened this year.  Ok then.  The Trojans will roll like crowds at a handicapped convention.
WIN - My summary did well.  For once.

***3 Beckinsales***  Stanford +2 UCLA - Wait...UCLA is favored?  Is this because Stanford is supposed to be Stanford?  Or because the Bruins have "home field advantage" in a sunny city with beautiful people?  How the hell is that scary?  Ohhh I know why, cuz they played well against Oregon last week, so that means they simply must beat the Cardinal.  I'm putting faith in Harbaugh once again.  Probably should have bought a point, but shit happens.
LOSS - You've got to be kidding me.  Touchdown with 16 seconds left?  God hates me.

***4 Beckinsales***  BOISE STATE -24.5 Hawaii - The Broncos get no love.  Like...at all.  The only team they've had any trouble with is Oregon, and they still won.  State's underrated defense will hold Hawaii enough to cover this spread.  Probably rather easily.  For the record, I don't want Peterson at Auburn.
LOSS - Totally dominated Hawaii, just made too many mistakes to cover.

***4 Beckinsales***  Ohio State -3 MICHIGAN STATE - I'm basing this on two simple assumptions:  The Buckeyes want to be known as contenders, and will play as such; and two, that if their defense is used to anything, it's trying to stop the run in practice against Beanie Wells.  Wells is far superior to Javon Ringer, and if you think differently, then you apparently believe everything ESPN tells you.  I think the Spartans finally get exposed, and all this Ringer-for-Heisman talk ceases.
WIN - Yeah, the above pretty much tells ya.

***5 Kate Beckinsales***  SOUTH FLORIDA -24 Syracuse - I feel like this line has lowered enough over the last few weeks with unresounding Bulls wins and decent appearances from the Orangewomen.  Syracuse is hoping momentum will carry them into Tampa and give them a fighting chance, when in reality, the Bulls bitchslap them back into reality after getting healthy on the bye week.  Go Mike Ford Go.
WIN - I don't know why Leavitt won't just unleash Mike Ford.  Same reason Clemson doesn't know how to use their backs either, I guess.  Ah well, the Bulls cleaned up anyway.

***5 Kate Beckinsales***  ILLINOIS -15.5 Indiana - This one worries me, cuz as I was betting on it, the line dropped a point from 16.5.  So some folks either know something orrrrr they're just stupid.  I'm sticking with the "Indiana sucks" motto until they burn me.  Which may very well be this week, but fuggit, I'm betting the house on Juice.  At home.  They should call it the Juice Box.  Ha.
WIN - Guess those folks were idiots.  55-13 is an ol' fashioned rape.

Here's hoping Walter sucks this week.  Although peaks and valleys tend to last longer than one week, so I'll have to patiently climb my way back to the top.