Now do you know why I hate sportscasters? Verne and Gary have usurped Bob Davie as the absolute worst announcers, possibly ever, in college football.
Verne and Gary's comments, obviously, for only one player (I only made one up):
He's been taking on SEC linebackers all year and he can still throw a slant!
How could you not run down fast after Tebow called you out?
I really think he's the greatest player in the history of the game.
Idiot A---If you were to start a franchise in college and you had the #1 pick, who would you pick? I would pick Tebow.
Idiot B--- *chuckle* So would I.
Imagine if Tebow played in the Big XII---no offense to McCoy or Bradford, but come on.
Well clearly Tebow wasn't the reason they were 0-5 when behind...just look at how he executed that play.
Idiot A---Gary, did you see that? If my old eyes don't deceive me, I swear I just saw Timmy impregnate that woman with his mind.
Idiot B---(fap fap fap)
Joker's Comments:
The aforementioned gay Jesus everyone tastes in their mouth isn't the super Christian you think he is. Ask half the women at Florida.
#63 for Florida kicked an Alabama player while down. Classy. Just like those jean shorts UF fans wear.
Brandon Spikes is a thug.
I hope Louis Murphy contracts scarlet fever. Xerxes-lookin' mother fuck.
I was hoarse after the first play to Julio.
Welp...told you bout the Florida/Oklahoma championship. Didn't want to be right this time, considering.
I'd bang Meyer's daughter silly. Probably have to wait until Urban finished, though.
Also, I'm retiring from making any more picks, cuz I always lose my luster down the line. Kinda like my football team. I can't say I'm mad, and I can't really say I'm disappointed. We were the #1 team in America for a while, we made it to the SEC Championship Game, we did this with 9 scholarship seniors, and we did this with a so-called "game manager" taking the snaps instead of an actual quarterback. If that doesn't tell you how good Nick Saban is, then I can't help ya, and don't spend my money on booze.
As for any more articles, I'll write some here and there until the season is complete, but I'm not into the NFL like I usually am, so no mock draft or any of that jazz in the future. Just keep reading Walter's site and register so you can yell and curse and rep the Joker Report on his forums.
I'll be back with my thoughts on our possible Sugar Bowl with possible Texas, Utah, or Oakland Raiders matchup. Til then, my friends.
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