Racer X - Week 1 Picks

Good morning, JR World,
 
I don't have much on my mind this morning.  Here's what I've got:
 
-Watched Pitt and Utah last night. When are people going to stop doubting Utah?  They've pretty much shown everyone they belong.  I think they are a great addition to the Pac-10.  They won't bring in a lot of TVs or anything (because everyone in Utah will be watching Big Love reruns), but they are a legit program and will honestly probably get better now that they can recruit California harder, since they'll probably play two games in that state per year. 
 

-This new "Dream Team" of USA basketball doesn't excite me a bit. Kevin Durant is a bad ass, but after that, the next biggest star is...?  Derrick Rose?  Lamar Kardashian?  (Obligatory chick shot:  Note-Lamar married the huger one.) 
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Without Kobe, DWade and LBJ, there just isn't anyone worth watching. We're not going to win the tournament with this squad. And Coach K still looks like a rat.  Uncle Buck paid him a quarter to gnaw a mole off a face once.

 
-Lane Kiffin going for two from the get-go? Nice.  Go for it, Lane. I ain't mad at ya.  Not with a wife like that.  Life is going to get very, very hard for you over the next couple of seasons, so you might as well kick someone while you're down.  In the meantime, your discipline and tackling were shit. 3-4 losses headed your way, bud. 
 

-Here is where Joker gives you a hot chick pic.  I'm uninspired this morning and have nobody in mind, so I defer to the owner. 
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(I will not tolerate laziness. This pic is reflective of your work ethic. ~J)

 
Haven't heard back from my nemesis, AUJClayton.  I guess he's not man enough to stand up to the challaaaaaaaaaange I threw down at his feet.  Oh well.  I'm sure he'll jump in sooner or later.  In the meantime, here are my brilliant picks for the weekend.
 
 
1)  South Carolina -13 vs. Southern Miss:  You can ask Joker. I got tied up (my your mom) and couldn't get an article in on time.  I told him this was one of my picks, though.  Would have been a 4 star pick.  WIN 
 
2) USC -14 @ Hawai'i:  Told Joker I wanted this one, too.  See, I'm honest.  Told him to "bet the fucking house".  I'm now homeless.  Anyone care to take in a kind, generous young man?  I'm clean and disease free...at least until the test comes back.  This would have been a 5 star pick.  LOSS 
 
3) Auburn -31 vs. Arkansas State:  Got to run up numbers while they can, although I kind of agree with the theory that AU won't show much, or subject Can't Newton to injury or big hits.  Possibly a ho-hum, boring victory, but I'll take it anyway. AU is always looking for positive pub.  (3 star) 
 
4)  LSU -6.5 vs. UNC:  As many as 16 players suspended for UNC and waaaay too many distractions.  LSU is schizo and their head coach is a moron, but they'll represent in this game. The SEC is still better than the ACC.  (4 star)
 
5)  Virginia Tech +2 vs. Boise State (In D.C.):  VT is physical and returns an experienced QB. They've had to listen to everyone talk about how good Boise is all summer long.  They will have the crowd on their side.  Boise can't be Cinderella forever.  Let's see how they do with the bullseye on their back for a change, with a capable, physical, defensive team aiming right at them.  Statue of Liberty ain't gonna help you now, Boise.  (4 star)
 
Have a great weekend everyone!  Lemme hear ya, AUJ. 

Comments

[Bill Fowler, Esq.]

1.

Boise wins a slugfest. This is the most important game in teh history of the Idaho Territory. I'll bet a sack of potatoes.

[El Matteo]

2.

I think VaTech gets 'em. Ryan Williams is a good back. Tyrod is capable. Bud Foster will have that D lathered up.

That's a lot of freakin' points for Auburn to cover. Their D still has a lot to prove. I can see Auburn scoring a lot of points, though. Maybe a 45-21 type thing.

Joker, why did you post that picture of Gene Chizik's wife?